University of Marriage

~ TWO-YEAR DEGREE FOR MEN ~

This is for those of you who are married, were married, or are contemplating marriage - under the assumption that men should be trained for marriage. A new two-year degree is being offered at the University of Marriage that many of you should be interested in. That's right, in just six semesters, you too, can be a real man as well as earn an MA degree (Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the program outline.

FIRST YEAR
Spring Schedule:
MEN 101: Combating Stupidity
MEN 102: You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103: PMS-Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104: We Do Not Want Sleazy Under Things for Christmas

Summer Schedule:
MEN 110: Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111: Understanding the Female Response to Getting In at 3am
MEN 112: Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception
EAT 100: Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101: Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A: What's Hers is Hers

Fall Schedule:
MEN 120: How NOT to Act Like a Jerk When You're Wrong
MEN 121: Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122: YOU, the Weaker Sex
MEN 123: Reasons to Give Flowers
ECON 001C: What Was Yours is Hers

SECOND YEAR
Spring Schedule:
SEX 101: You CAN Fall Asleep Without It
SEX 102: Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103: How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 201: How to Put the Toilet Seat Down (Elective)
(See Electives Below)

Summer Schedule:
MEN 210: The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211: How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212: You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver
MEN 213: Honestly, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise
MEN 230A: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important

Fall Schedule:
MEN 221: Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is Not Necessary
MEN 222: Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 223: Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay
MEN 230B: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important II

COURSE ELECTIVES
EAT 101: Cooking with Tofu
EAT 102: Utilization of Eating Utensils
EAT 103: Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231: Mothers-in-law
MEN 232: Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233: Just Say "Yes, Dear"
ECON 001C: Cheaper to Keep Her